Stewards Log: 8:45:02:06:2010
What is coaching and how can I be the best coach possible?
Great question, coaching is many things;
- it’s about building skills and competencies in others helping them to gain the knowledge they need to succeed at their tasks in life,
- it’s about helping your clients, friends, co-workers and spouses (careful with this one) change their P.O.V. (point of view), shift it if you will to create a new identity within themselves,
- it’s about discovering old habits and “filters”, understanding how they affect our lives, interrupting those that sabotage our lives, and building new patters and programs,
- it’s about understanding our purpose in life or the life in purpose,
- and it’s about teams, organizations, market places, communities, and social fields dynamically blending in a group-individuality-group relationship,
A great coach will combine many of those to create the outcome the client wanted, but it will take time and a lot of effort, so let me share a simple formulae with you:
Result of our coaching = My Clients Commitment x My Commitment to my client
So to be the best coach you can be, we only need worry about 2 things:
This is what we call a double-edged sword, because it is simple but hard to manage your own commitment. Keeping in mind that we are taking about coaching, which means we are standing back while our client learns from failure and challenges while not getting directly involved…Hard but Simple! Additionally we need to manage our own energy level and focus to give our clients our full faculty and attention.
Your Clients Commitment
Here we have our catch 22, a client who has zero commitment will get no results ( 0 x Nything = 0). So first we need to understand our clients motivation, if they have some we can work with it, but just like moods and energy levels, commitment needs to be replenished consistently. Here are what I consider the “simplest” (not necessarily the easiest) ways to build up your clients commitment.
I’ve always taken a consultative approach to coaching so first I seek the motivation and help the client to understand it.
“Why are we here?”
“What happens if nothing changes?”
“How committed are you to changing your life?”
“What will this change mean to you?”
Helping you client to understand the purpose, rewards and pains associated with the change will give them the motivation to be committed. This will also give you support for their future committment refills.
“When we first started you said this would mean … has that changed?”
“Are you still committed to having … happen?”
“Are you no longer afraid of … remaining in your life?”
This does mean we have to play hard ball, but our committment can catapult their committment to a higher level. Remember above all to be patient.
To wrap this post up I’d like to share a piece I read all my coaching clients when we meet for the first time:
Until one is committed there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back,
Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation) there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans;
That the moment one defiantly commits oneself,
Then providence moves too.
All sorts of things occur to help one that would otherwise never have occurred.
A whole stream of events issue from the decision,
Raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings
And material assistance,
Which no man could have dreamt Would have come his way.
“Whatever you can do, or dream you can … begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.”
The Scottish Himalayan Expedition 1951
So what does Commitment mean to you?